A thought challenges you to think. A joke forces you to laugh. Enjoy both for the cost of none.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Legacy/Shmegacy

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, "Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer."

The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for every passersby would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone. However he suggested an alternative: He would inscribe, "Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer."

That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark: "That`s Strange".

***

Ok, we all know that G-d made a flood which only Noah and his family survived. We also know that a few years later the inhabitants of Babel decided to build the "Tower of Babel", a structure that would reach to the sky. Why build such a tower? Two reasons: for security, and to make a "legacy" of themselves.

Sounds nice, doesn't it? Obviously not, just see what G-d's reaction to this tower building was. He turned some of them into apes, mixed up their languages, dispersed them all over the world etc. I guess this wasn't the best of ideas…

What would warrant such a response? What's wrong with wanting to leave a legacy? Don't we all want to be remembered for some great achievement of ours?

Why? I'll tell you why! It is barely a few years after the world was flooded because of corruption and sin. And all these people have to think about is 'how are we going to leave a legacy!' that is all that's on their minds! How many pages of history books will be filled with our story of unprecedented architectural achievement.

Hello! How about creating a moral code? Schools? Houses of worship? Did not the entire globe get punished due to a lack of morals? Hadn't they learnt that in order to keep the world going, there are important changes that must be implemented?

No, they were busy leaving a legacy. Who cares about a legacy! There's a world out there in distress and in dire need of help and hope. Leave your legacy alone and go make a difference. Your legacy can wait, the world cannot.

That is why they were punished by G-d.

Legacy is nice; a bit egoistic, but nice. Especially if it's not an Al Capone style legacy. But in times like this we must put our eulogies, obituaries and grave stones aside, and go change something in this world for the better.

We need Moshiach to come. There is no time for legacy… Let's go!


Thursday, October 23, 2008

How Does G-d Bring Out a Point?

Act #1

If G-d decided to make a point in a way that we - humans should understand, how would He do it?

He would write an extra letter in the Bible.

Then twenty Rabbis would debate it, filling up a few 2000 word pages in the Talmud, all the commentaries with the small words would debate what the Talmud meant when he explained what G-d meant.

Then Maimonides would offer his interpretation, some other rabbi would write a book proving him wrong. Then for the next thousand years till this very day, many pulpit rabbis would take the audacity and right to offer their own interpretation/twist on that one seemingly extra letter in the Bible. (Hey, even I try to do it once in a while…)

Point is, that when G-d Wants to get a point across he knows how to, short and sweet.

Act #2

Ask anyone out there, 'what is the Bible?' and he'll tell you that it is the book of laws for the Jewish people. And if he's a bit of a scholar he might add that the word Torah can be translated as lesson and guide, a rule book.

If that's the case, then why is the first quarter of the Torah (the entire book of Genesis and half of Exodus!) telling a story? Creation, flood, patriarchs, Twelve Tribes, Egypt, exodus, Sinai… If G-d wanted us to know our history He should have written a history book, why insert it into the Bible? And in the beginning of the Bible at the top of it!

Says Rashi in his opening commentary on the Bible, that when the nations of the world will question our legitimacy to the land of Israel, we will reply, "The entire earth belongs to the Holy One, blessed be He; He created it and gave it to whomever He deemed proper. When He wished, He gave it to them, and when He wished, He took it away from them and gave it to us."

Act #3

Question: Ok, so G-d wanted to bring out the point that Israel belongs to the Jewish people; but did He need to write the longest speech in history (quarter of the Bible!) to do so? Wouldn't we have gotten the hint if it were to be said in just one letter or a word?

Do you know the answer?

You don't? Then maybe go ask the UN, and they'll explain you why the country with the most condemnations in the world, is a country not found on many maps, a democratic state somewhere in a region of tyrants and terrorists. Ask them why the mere mention of that country makes their blood boil.

Then you can meet the many of the residents of that very tiny country who doubt their very own legitimacy to the country they live in!

And then maybe you'll understand why G-d had to bring out His point by "spending" a quarter of the Bible telling us a story...

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Thank You for Throwing out this Email

Sadie is having terrible headaches that just won't go away so she goes to her rabbi to see if there's anything he can do. She whines, and cries and talks for hours not only about her headache, but about her terrible living conditions as well.

All of the sudden, Sadie shouts, overjoyed, "Rabbi, I think your holy presence has cured me! The headache is completely gone!

To which the rabbi responds, "No, no Sadie, it's not gone. I have it now."

***

Statistics show that one out of four people has not read even one book from cover to cover over the last year! With that in mind, there's a 25% chance that you have not seen the final pages of a book in quite a long time…

I'm sure however, that no matter if you are a book worm or have a diagnosed phobia from literature, this is one thing we can agree on: no book concludes with these words, "Thank you for ripping up this book!" and that simple point needs no explanation, for it's basic common sense.

Common sense, but not G-dly sense.

This Wednesday we conclude the year long cycle of the weekly readings of the Torah. So before we roll back the scroll to the beginning, let's us at least grab a look at the final words of the Bible:

"And there was no other prophet who arose in Israel like Moses… as manifested by all the signs and wonders… and all the strong hand, and all the great awe, which Moses performed before the eyes of all Israel."

What strong hand and awesome deed did Moshe perform before the eyes of all Israel?

The commentator Rashi explains that this refers to the breaking of the tablets. When Moses came down from the mountain and saw the terrible sin of the golden calf he smashed the two tablets containing the Ten Commandments. Rashi Says, that by wrapping up the Torah with this episode, G-d was telling Moshe "This was your greatest deed ever, and thank you for breaking the tablets!"

Huh? Is that the way one concludes a book, by thanking the publisher who threw it out of the window? And what lesson are we supposed to learn from all of this?

One second, before we question the reason for mentioning this episode, let us first understand Moshe's motive for breaking the tablets. Why did he throw them away? What was his motive?

Well, Moshe was on the way to deliver the constitution of the Jews from heaven. The Jews had so far only heard the reading of the constitution at Sinai, but they had not yet received the actual contract (tablets). Meaning that they can not yet be punished for violating Commandment #2, "You shall not have the gods of others in My presence," For they have not received the contract!

So Moshe smashed it, and with that saved his nation. And that was Moshe's greatest achievement!

The lesson: G-d is teaching us that there is something more important than study – the Jew. Hence, at the finally of G-d's magnum opus He tells us: "Yes, all I Write here is important, but what is more important is the love and sacrifice for your fellow man."

*

And another cycle of the Torah is about to begin… Breishis, here we come!

Sunday, October 12, 2008

The Four Moods

So it's that time of the year again where pious Jews start living outdoor Hawaiian style. Plus once a day they take a bunch of leaves with a citrus, wrap them together and shake 'em, raising eyebrows from many a passerby.

Let's take a closer look at what this green and yellow combo is comprised of… and maybe we can even find great relevance to our daily lives!

We'll start with the best looking and tasting of the bunch, the Etrog – citrus. Ah what a taste and oh what a smell. Like those times when we are at our best, willing to do anything were asked, our temper is locked away, our self esteem is just perfect, we are strong and firm and at the same time soft and warm.

Downside? Ego. It's at these times that our ego takes a soar to the heavens… 'I'm just the best'.

Etrog – we're in the mood for everything.

In second place comes the Lulav – palm frond. Palms (dates) have a great taste but lack aroma, implying that they have substance – mind, but lack smell– action. I am honest and fair, I read every book on business management and on being the perfect spouse and parent, and I follow them to the letter! You'll never find me doing the wrong thing, I am a fully thought out person.

So what's my downside? Don't ask me to take out the garbage, because I'm too busy learning the different personalities of my three year old son and my six month old daughter and how it affects their relationship… Oh, and to fold laundry? Please, that is so dull. Basically I'm the kind of guy who's wonderful to describe on paper and on the tomb, but not necessarily easy to live with.

Lulav – we're in the mood for reflection, not action.

A millisecond later comes in our third mood the Hadas – myrtle. Smells like heaven, but nothing to munch on. Lots of warmth, but no brains… I'll build anything you ask from me, I'll take out the garbage, yes, yes, yes whatever you ask. Robot.

Downside? One thing I can't do is to sit and reflect. I'm not in the mood to delve into intellectual pursuits, I'm just busy doing the right thing and I don't have time to learn what the right thing is!

Hadas – Just do, don't think. Not exactly a relationship mood…

In the last place we have Mr. and Mrs. Arava – willow. Nothing to talk about. No taste and no smell. Just one lousy mood. Those times when we roll up in the blanket until 4 pm and forget the world exists and all else. Zero productivity.

Upside? This mood is honest and humble! He knows his faults and he doesn't feel too good about it…

Arava – lock down.

Take all these moods, which sometimes can all occur within the same 24 hours… and learn from the pro's and con's of each of them. Wrap them all together, say a blessing to G-d and request him to make us greater and stronger than our moods. Then shake them and shake them and shake them until you become master of them all…

One.


Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Fake it Till You Make it!

This past Shabbos I spent my afternoon at a Bar Mitzva of a friend. We all sat together in a basketball gym turned ballroom and tried to no avail to listen to speeches in a room with the worst acoustics anyone could have invented, and we wished L'chaim to the new 'big boy' and his family.

Once the formal part was over the informal part began. Around a small table laden with leftovers and schnapps the Yeshiva boys sat down for a Farbrengen - a sit together with a dynamic 'Farbrenger's relative of the boy.

We find ourselves two hours 'in' and the atmosphere is warm and honest. It's time for real and honest reflection.

"In the real world, says the farbrenger, there is a slogan that says "fake it till you make it!" For example a stock broker who must drive a car at a 600 dollars a month lease, and wear Fifth Avenue suits making sure to always look sharp and spiffy.

In reality however this guy is just out college and he's a total shnorer, and the fancy suit was borrowed from uncle Hymie and the leased car is about to be confiscated by the IRS…

But what's the poor guy supposed to do? The only way anybody is gonna blink in his direction is if he looks like he's a something.

What happens later? Well in the beginning it's all a fake, but with G-d's help eventually it becomes a reality and he can afford to lend his fancy suits to the newbie's…

Fake it till you make it!

This is so relevant to each and every one of us, cries the Farbrenger, in so many different ways.

For example we have the guy that says: "Oh, this whole Jewish thing, c'mon I only come Yom Kippur and that's only because grandpa won't mention me in his will unless I come, so why make believe that I'm praying?"

What do we tell him? "Fake it till you make it!

"I hate my parent/sibling/neighbor/classmate so why fake it as if we get along?"

Fake it till you make it!

"My self esteem is in the Dead Sea and I feel useless, so why go around and continue living and putting up a smile as if life is normal?"

Fake it till you make it!

Dear friends, may you and your family be sealed in the Book of Life for the coming year. And may this year be a year when the faking stops with the coming of the true redemption speedily in our days.

Time To revolt

The whole World is waiting for You!

The Rebbe - the ultimate revolutionary

The Rebbe - the ultimate revolutionary